comprehensive.

feelings.
the colour of the word feelings says it all doesn't it. well what i can say is that, recently i been like this snail. everytime i feel danger is aproaching me or i feel some kind of negative vibe i tend to hide in my shell ; pull away from people or just get really irritated by it. i slowly tend to bottle up more things. for those who seen me at my best and worst would know what i mean, i dont speak much about anything but mostly general stuff now. maybe its a good thing too. cause in the past years that i had no secrets and trusted my friends. it all kind of back fired on me. well, now im full of secrets. but my lips are sealed. getting in deeper. well recently 'the phone call' didnt hurt as much as it used to but i did feel the urge or saying baby and saying how much i miss you but then think of it. i start to reflect you and wanting to disappear. but i know my heart lingers your name some where in that little part i saved for you. but thats just me maybe, you said you loved me and i said i loved you too. but i dont know why those mere words came out so suddenly. even i was shocked. but yes. i am taking tiny steps away from this. moving on, me and this guy once had a thing but it ended about 2 months ago now. well we used to be super close and bestfriends. but now i find it hard to talk to him or trust anyone with anything. it's sometimes a little awkward with him. and lunch just isnt the same anymore. well after all that happened. its just hard to look at the person the same way you know what i mean. its like were just two aquaintances. some sort of thing like that. but for now. im not looking for anyone to come around. taking a good break. 5 years of commitment. heres my time out. i mean well 3 years with one guy and 2 with another. after that had a few trial and error but just not so into it anymore. i mean who doesn't love romance but relationships are too corny for me. (no offense people this is just for my opionion based on my experience.) i mean if the right one does come along then i'll be the time again. but now im not scouting. im awaiting :). friends been on the go. and so has family. little brothers are still pain in the asses but well. dad's getting new car and suprisingly said to me he wanted me to get my license so i could test drive my own car. everyone seems to be in reall tip top shape and mood. the fact malaysian weather had increased by 7 degrees since 2001 and people still smiling while melting away. feeling the pressure for exams that are coming up on 1st Sept and SPM on the 15th November. havent studies at all. my basics are out and so are my form 5 subs. im dead meat. but other than that, my feelings are more stable now. so im fine :) but once in awhile i do get my breakdowns. but i am keeping my head high. :D

goals.
x. get my range rover.(yes, my dad keeps changing his price range so im fluctuating too.)
x. finish up my exams and just cross my fingers.
x. get a part time job. (probably some PR work and entertainment jobs.)
x. get accepted into college
- foundation in arts in Taylors College Puchong. (yes, the new campus with the lake.[2010])
- get into mass communication. majoring in Public Relations (PR) - Degree.
x. move to Australia. Melbourne. and get singed into college there.

well basicly my main goals. of course family and friends, etc does not need to be part of goals they're my ambition :)

highlight of the day.
andreaa has two friends in her room snoozing away. yeap. they're snooring haha! ttfn. :)