the break up.

so this is
what a broken heart feels like
to be spilled across the floor
you know he wont catch you
not this time
not anymore.

so this is
what it feels like
to be played and manipulated
to be betrayed and he wont come back
to fall from grace
build a wall so high
but he's the weakness
you fall.

wake up every morning
reminding yourself
it's a part of life
but you can't deny
its burning pain
you can't understand
how it all fell apart

so this is
what it feels like to regret
to miss someone
and love him
when he wont love you back
she points out the mistakes
as she makes the same
with him
but blind to see

now
you know it hurts
and you felt you could
do a little better
but you also know
he didn't give you
love and the respect

in fear
the phobia of loving
you're back at where you started
the girl in the past
but the break up hurt so bad
you just cant please the pain
then you sit on your bed
music to its loudest
crying to yourself

you're falling in love with someone
but you don't want to
afraid it might hurt
or happen all over again
you forget what's it like to smile
this new guy brings it back
but he's real
are you?

its been months
but you linger
you wont forget
then you remember
you tried
to save him from regret
but he's already gone

so this is
what it feels like to let go
for someone's happiness
it hurts
but its harder
when you don't know
how he is doing

you worry
you care
you wont say you love him
and you cant say it doesn't hurt
you lost yourself
but you know
i walked away
cause i had too
i didn't want to break up
but you forced us to it.

as i sit here
writing this letter
listening to the songs
which would bring memories
i know i have to take your words
and slowly walk away.

maybe one day
id turn back
and not cry
and the pain is gone
but till then
im afraid that
im still in love with you.